A girl who doesn’t see herself as someone beautiful is already hard enough for her. The moment you asked her to be yours, it means you are committed and devoted to her. Even if it means you have to hold her tight at 2am and asking her why is she so down and always having ‘It’s nothing’ as an answer. Trust me, she will never believe you when you say she looks beautiful without makeup on or when her hair is a mess. She will always deny that. She will always find something about herself and tells you how she hates that part of her. She would say her skin isn’t flawless or she would feel insecure seeing another girl who is prettier than her. She will deny everyone who compliments her along the way. Even if someone said that she looked pretty today, she denies it to the core and tells herself they’re just saying that because they’re her friends.
Out of the blue, she will push you away just because she doesn’t feel good about herself and that she thinks you are better off with someone better or prettier. Do expect that she will ask this question a lot, even if she knows what your answer is gonna be, “Why me, while there are a lot of other girls out there? Even better girls” and when she does ask you that, please don’t ever, ever stop answering her. Tell her why you fell for her the first time you saw her. Tell her that a day without hearing her voice kills you. Tell her that you love every inch of her and that you wouldn’t have it any other way. Just hold on, even if she pushes you away.
She believes that she will never get the love she deserves and how you would have a better relationship with someone else and not her and she hates that she was never good enough for you. But she knows this more than anyone else that if she had to let you go, it would be the hardest thing she will ever have to do and it will break her so much. She needs you more than anyone else, you may not know this but to have you in her life will make her days better than it was before. She may not show it often to you, but she will be glad that after her hectic days are coming to an end she would have you to tell it all to. It’s a refuge for her knowing that you would be right there when she’s on her worst.
So I’m telling you this, if you ever love a girl that doesn’t love herself, just hold on and never stop trying. Just be there and be patient. Hold her hand through it all because I can bet my life on it, that it will all be worth it in the end. Eventually, she will love herself. Bit by bit, slowly. That’s when you will see that sparkle in her eyes, that same look you had when you first laid your eyes on her. That’s when she will be happier than she was before. She will love you fully and completely, with all her heart because she trusts you more than anyone else. Just promise that you will hold onto her no matter how hard it is. Just work things out with her. Don’t push her away and just be patient, because the first day you asked her to be yours, that’s the day you that you are committed and devoted to her. Don’t let her go just because she hasn’t learned to love herself, because boy, she’s trying her hardest to find that within her. She’s trying to love herself just as much as she loves you.
✉️ Jessica Audrey
The Other Side of Me 